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Wave, by Sonali Deraniyagala
Download PDF Wave, by Sonali Deraniyagala
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Winner of the PEN/Ackerley Prize 2014 The book opens and we are inside the wave: thirty feet high, moving at twenty-five mph, racing two miles inland. And from there into the depths of the author's despair: how to live now that her life has been undone? Sonali Deraniyagala tells her story - the loss of her two boys, her husband, and her parents - without artifice or sentimentality. In the stark language of unfathomable sorrow, anger, and guilt: she struggles through the first months following the tragedy -- someone always at her side to prevent her from harming herself, her whole being furiously clenched against the reality she can't face; and then reluctantly emerging and, over the ensuing years, slowly allowing her memory to function again. Then she goes back through the rich and joyous life she's mourning, from her family's home in London, to the birth of her children, to the year she met her English husband at Cambridge, to her childhood in Colombo while learning the balance between the almost unbearable reminders of her loss and her fundamental need to keep her family, somehow, still with her.
- Sales Rank: #10089802 in Books
- Published on: 2013
- Original language: English
- Dimensions: 8.74" h x .91" w x 5.55" l, .0 pounds
- Binding: Hardcover
Amazon.com Review
An Amazon Best Book of the Month, March 2013: In an unblinking act of storytelling, Sonali Deraniyagala ruthlessly chronicles the aftermath of the 2004 tsunami that horrifically snatched from her all that mattered. Throughout this fierce and furious book, I kept wondering how someone who lost so much could write about it with such power, economy and grace. At first, she shrieks and grieves openly, angrily; for years she remains stunned and staggered, shamed by “the outlandish truth of me.” Then, slowly, she allows herself to remember, sharing vivid glimpses of her past. We see, hear, and smell two rowdy little boys, their brotherly scuffling, their muddy shoes and grass stains. By confronting and recreating moments that make us laugh and weep, we accept their absence and root for the author not to quit. Difficult to describe, tricky to recommend, this is a bold and wondrous book. In a wounded voice that manages to convey the snide, sarcastic, funny, and fatalistic personality that survives beneath the pain, Deraniyagala slowly pieces together the elements that represent the life--the lives--she lost. And she brings them back. For us, for her, for them. So brave, so beautiful, in these pages Deraniyagala’s family is brilliantly alive. And so is she. --Neal Thompson
From Booklist
It was a festive time. Economist Deraniyagala, her economist husband (they met at Cambridge), and their two young sons flew from London to Sri Lanka to spend the winter holidays with her parents. They were all staying in a hotel near their favorite national park on December 26, 2004, the day of the devastating Indian Ocean tsunami. Deraniyagala describes their bewilderment as they flee the hotel and her terror as they are swept up by the 30-foot-high, racing wave that brutally changed everything. Only Deraniyagal survived. In rinsed-clear language, she describes her ordeal, surreal rescue, and deep shock, attaining a Didionesque clarity and power. We hold tight to every exquisite sentence as, with astounding candor and precision, she tracks subsequent waves of grief, from suicidal despair to persistent fear, attempts to drown her pain in drink, “helpless rage,” guilt and shame, and paralyzing depression. But here, too, are sustaining tides of memories that enable her to vividly, even joyfully, portray her loved ones. An indelible and unique story of loss and resolution written with breathtaking refinement and courage. --Donna Seaman
Review
In her unflinching writing you live through the horror and despair, but also feel her self-generated repair and the promise of survival -- Harriet Walter The Week
Most helpful customer reviews
28 of 28 people found the following review helpful.
Painful, impactful, courageous. . .read it!
By Susanne
This short book is one I will never forget. The writer tells us in simple, straightforward language how she managed to survive, and eventually, live, after losing her entire family in the 2005 tsunami. I don't think I've ever read anyone write as simply and stunningly as this - about extreme loss. At each juncture in the months, then years after the tsunami, readers learn how Deraniyagala coped by shutting out parts of her pre-tsunami life, and how she very gradually let memories in. She offers no magical answers, nothing but her years of dealing with this horrendous loss.
I read alot, about 70 books a year, and very very few get five stars. Five stars for me means the book goes way beyond "well-written", or "good story" to the level of impactful in my own life. I can't think of another book about loss that resonates so much - -
I have nothing comparable to her loss but her words help me view my own losses through different lenses.
I will remember this book just as I will always remember Joan Didon's Year of Magical Thinking. . .it's unforgettable. Deraniyagala displays unbelievable courage.
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful.
A Memoir of Horrific Loss and, Ultimately, Resilience
By Fairbanks Reader - Bonnie Brody
Sonali Deraniyagala has undergone a tragedy of such magnitude that it amazes me that she has been able to write about it. On December 26, 2004, she was vacationing in Yala, Sri Lanka when a tsunami came and killed her husband and two children as well as her parents. Sonali managed to hold on to a branch and survive. She is numb and incredulous. She can not speak, for to say the words of what happened would make it real and she feels better off in a fog. "I had learned some facts by now, so I recited them in my head. The wave was more than thirty feet high here. It moved through the land at twenty-five miles an hour. It charged inland for more than two miles, then went back into the ocean. All that I saw around me had been submerged. I told myself this over and over. Understanding nothing."
For a long time, she avoids thinking about her family. She drinks heavily, takes sleeping medication and tries to keep herself in a stupor. She thinks of suicide constantly and imagines different ways that she can take her life. She sees no reason to go on without the family she adored. Her relatives in Sri Lanka watch her day and night but that doesn't stop her from cutting herself, and hurting herself in other ways.
She and her parents are from Sri Lanka and she finds out that her parents' house has been rented. She harasses the renters, a Dutch family, because she wants to sit in the house where her children played and her parents lived, feeling the energy and calmness that is only available to her there.
This book is the story of her journey during an eight year period. Both she and her husband were professors in London and were on sabbatical in Sri Lanka when the wave came. They were due to leave Yala that evening. Now, Ms. Deraniyagala is a guest professor at Columbia University in New York. We travel with her on her geographic journeys as well as her psychic ones as she yearns at first to be demolished and not to think of her family, to a place in her heart where she wants the memories of her family close to her.
She attributes a lot of her healing to her therapist. It is poignant to see how she clutches the memories of her two boys to her heart at the end, one eight years old and one five years old when the tsunami hit. We learn how she met her husband, Steve, while a student at Cambridge. Sonali imagines what her children and husband would be like today. She grasps at these memories in order to make herself whole though she keeps her personal history mostly to herself when with acquaintances. "By knowing them again, by gathering threads of our life, I am much less fractured. I am also less confused....I can recover myself better when I dare let in their light."
This is a brave and heartrending memoir, one that is shocking and horrific at times. I try to imagine what the author is going through and it is impossible. No one but she can feel this pain. I highly recommend this book for its forthright manner and truth, both its despair and ultimately, its resilience in the face of great loss.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
The joy which precedes
By sunny Bower
Loss. Rip your heart out---fist pounding, mouth openwide, silent scream, on your knees --unbearable loss. This memoir-- WAVE--opens at an idylic beach resort on the coast of Sri Lanka in 2004. It's the day after Christmas. Families are gathered in the joyful spirit of the season, unaware that a tidal wave will soon wash away, everything and everyone. How does one survive and compress the tale of that kind of pain onto paper? How does one fill in the life stories of family members, bringing them to alive for the reader? This is a story so much bigger than the details of their epic demise. Truth telling. The raw, sparse prose by an extraordinarly gifted writer, Somali Deraniyagala, is riveting. The pain is palpable. The joy which precedes, poignant. Wisdom envitable. I promise you--the well told story behind this incomprehensible event and it's fallout--will remind you what matters most. Now go kiss your kids!
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